T&O: insecurity & asumptions

I'm back! Well.. I am so glad that year-end exams were finally over, in another words: freedom is here. This is my very first T&O blog post. What does it stand for? T = Thoughts and O = Opinions. Yes! Its a personal view and thinking toward certain things which others might agree or maybe...disagree. It is actually a free will thing to do. I came out with the topic on "insecurity and assumptions" and thought maybe I would like to share my experience and views with all readers.

I admit I, myself for one, can get really insecure over some things that I start assuming everything. I can end up messing things up and making them worse. I know I am still quite young and has a whole lot of challenges to face ahead each day... but I would like to still share a little about myself.... this shall be a serious post.

I have had a few bad relationships with people before, there was somewhat a case on me being too overboard that I ruined the whole year friendship. But...thanks heaven I kind of stay true to my feelings and stayed strong over the whole thing. Like what they say: people comes and goes. That's life. Nothing really lasts forever, I gotta accept this fact. About the good friend during primary school? Well, we had like approximately a year of friendship, we were good friends who went to recess together most of the times. But there was this day when she was kind of... urgh. She talked something hurtful about me to another classmate. I kind of took it too seriously that the whole case was brewing up. I do not blame her, but I admit I used to dislike her after what she did. However, I truly feel that time is a healer, I got the strength to forgive her, accept the whole thing and move on. That agony kind of left a scar upon me, up till now, but I strongly believe that it will fade away gradually. its only good that I learned another life lesson... not to think too much and act rash. Its me being negative and blurting out ironic things to people that breaks the whole friendship. I did have trust issues back then.

Another thing on why I feel insecure about myself is mainly due to the earlier part of gossiping case in my life. Nonetheless, like what I was implying earlier... I sort of accepted imperfection among each and everyone of us. We had all been the victims and culprits of gossiping before.Whatever negative thing someone said about me, I shall not take it to heart anymore! Everyone is made unique in their own ways, we get stronger each day by accepting our flaws and willing to become a better person. I used to be a really quiet girl in school, who people might think I keep things to myself, an introvert in fact. Some called me an "emo", "weirdo" and words related to it. I do not feel good upon hearing that. I went to recess alone most of the time. However, as time passes each day, I started opening up a little, I got the courage to make conversations with class/schoolmates and make good friends. Sometimes, we just gotta stand up for ourselves. I am so thankful to have someone who is willing to go "crazy" with me now, such a lovely bestie I have! (KT... its referring to you, if you read this).

In a nutshell, I find that insecurity and assumptions are mainly feelings and acts that ruin things like bonding, self-esteems and confidence. Somehow, we can be really depressed due to over-thinking and misleading cases.  I was once a really negative person, but I tried to get more motivation on being happier by researching topics on insecurity, observing people with positive attitudes, and accepting that things might not always go they way I want it to be. What's most important will be the fact that you are strong to carry on and believe you will find the rainbow anytime soon.

I wish you all the best, my dear friend.